Virus Warning and how to fix it!

The Center for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically.

This virus is called Weary Overload Recreational Killer (WORK).

If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues or anyone else via any means whatsoever - DO NOT TOUCH IT.

This virus will wipe out your private life completely.

If you should come into contact with WORK you should immediately leave the premises.

Take two good friends to the nearest grocery store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER).

Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

You should immediately forward this medical alert to five friends.

If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

Things are not looking good at all!

Wall Street fears for next Great Depression

 

Wall Street is bracing itself for another week of roller-coaster trading after more than $300bn (£150bn) was wiped off the US equity markets on Friday following the emergency funding package put together by the Federal Reserve and JPMorgan Chase to rescue Bear Stearns.

One UK economist warned that the world is now close to a 1930s-like Great Depression, while New York traders said they had never experienced such fear. The Fed's emergency funding procedure was first used in the Depression and has rarely been used since.

A Goldman Sachs trader in New York said: "Everyone is in a total state of shock, aghast at what is happening. No one wants to talk, let alone deal; we're just standing by waiting. Everyone is nervous about what is going to emerge when trading starts tomorrow."

In the UK, Michael Taylor, a senior market strategist at Lombard, the economics consultancy, said on Friday night: "We have all been talking about a 1970s-style crisis but as each day goes by this looks more like the 1930s. No one has any clue as to where this is going to end; it's a self-feeding disaster." Mr Taylor, who had been relatively optimistic, has turned bearish: "It really does look as though the UK is now heading for a recession. The credit-crunch means that even if the Bank of England cuts rates again, the banks are in such a bad way they are unlikely to pass cuts on."

Mr Taylor added that he expects a sharp downturn in the real UK economy as the public and companies stop borrowing. "We have never seen anything like this before. This is new territory for us. Liquidity is being pumped into the system but the banks are not taking any notice. This is all about confidence. The more the central banks do, the more the banks seem to ignore what's going on."

Mr Taylor added that the problems unravelling at Bear Stearns are just the beginning: "There will be more banks and hedge funds heading for collapse."

One of the problems facing the markets is that, despite the Fed's move last week to feed them another $200bn, the banks are still not lending to each other.

"This crisis is one of faith. We are going to see even more problems in the hedge funds as they face margin calls," said Mark O'Sullivan, director of dealing at Currencies Direct in London. "What we are waiting for now is for the Fed to cut interest rates again this week. But that's already been discounted by the market and is unlikely to help restore confidence."

Mr O'Sullivan added that the dollar's free-fall is set to continue and may need cuts in European interest rates to trim the euro's recent strength against the dollar. "But the ECB doesn't like cutting rates," he said.

On Europe, Mr Taylor said that while the German economy remains strong, others such as Italy's and Spain's are weakening. "You could see a scenario where the eurozone breaks up if economies continue to be so worried about inflation."

European financial markets were relatively unscathed by Wall Street's crisis but traders expect there to be a backlash when stock markets open tomorrow.

The Fed's plan will give 28 days of secured funding to Bear Stearns, which saw its value slashed over the week by more than a half to $3.7bn. JP Morgan will provide the funding, but the Fed will bear the risk if the loan is not repaid. Fed chairman, Ben Bernanke, who pumped $200bn of loans to cash-strapped institutions last week, said more would be available to help others in distress.

 

Woman sits on boyfriend's toilet for 2 years

Girlfriend was physically stuck to the seat — her skin had grown around it

NESS CITY, Kan. - Deputies said a woman in western Kansas sat on her boyfriend's toilet for two years, and they're investigating whether she was mistreated.

Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said a man called his office last month to report that something was wrong with his girlfriend.

Whipple said it appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman’s skin had grown around the seat. She initially refused emergency medical services but was finally convinced by responders and her boyfriend that she needed to be checked out at a hospital.

 “We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital,” Whipple said. “The hospital removed it.”

Whipple said investigators planned to present their report Wednesday to the county attorney, who will determine whether any charges should be filed against the woman's 36-year-old boyfriend.

“She was not glued. She was not tied. She was just physically stuck by her body,” Whipple said. “It is hard to imagine. ... I still have a hard time imagining it myself.”

He told investigators he brought his girlfriend food and water, and asked her every day to come out of the bathroom.

“And her reply would be, ‘Maybe tomorrow,”’ Whipple said. “According to him, she did not want to leave the bathroom.”

The boyfriend called police on Feb. 27 to report that “there was something wrong with his girlfriend,” Whipple said, adding that he never explained why it took him two years to call.

Police found the clothed woman sitting on the toilet, her sweat pants down to her mid-thigh. She was “somewhat disoriented,” and her legs looked like they had atrophied, Whipple said.

“She said that she didn’t need any help, that she was OK and did not want to leave,” he said.

She was taken to a hospital in Wichita, about 150 miles southeast of Ness City. Whipple said she has refused to cooperate with medical providers or law enforcement investigators.

Authorities said they did not know if she was mentally or physically disabled.

Police have declined to release the couple’s names, but the house where authorities say the incident happened is listed in public records as the residence of Kory McFarren. No one answered his home phone number.

The case has been the buzz in Ness City, said James Ellis, a neighbor.

“I don’t think anybody can make any sense out of it,” he said.

Ellis said he had known the woman since she was a child but that he had not seen her for at least six years.

He said she had a tough childhood after her mother died at a young age and apparently was usually kept inside the house as she grew up. At one time the woman worked for a long-term care facility, he said, but he did not know what kind of work she did there.

“It really doesn’t surprise me,” Ellis said of the bathroom incident. “What surprises me is somebody wasn’t called in a bit earlier.”

 

Kuwaiti analyst: Best if Israel, not U.S., destroys Iranian nukes

If you ever wondered why I hate the Arab leaders so much, you should read this.

 

These pathetic ass-holes who did everything they could to support Saddam in the 80s, who later paid them back by occupying their “country” and doing what he did to Iranians a few years earlier, not praying for an Israeli attack against Iran.

 

They are making the same stupid mistake again and again and they have not learned anything since the past 300 years that their enemy is not Iran, but their own stupidity to see Portuguese, Spaniards years ago and in modern time the Britts, Americans and ultimately brutal bastard dictators like Saddam and now Israeli as their friends!

 

 

Kuwaiti analyst: Best if Israel, not U.S., destroys Iranian nukes

By News Agencies

Tags: Israel, Iran, Kuwait, nuclear

 

http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/962291.html

The destruction of Iran's nuclear capabilities would be in the interest of the Arab nations in the Gulf, and it would be less embarrassing if it was done by Israel rather than the U.S., a top Kuwaiti strategist said in remarks published Sunday.

Officially Kuwait, like the other members of the Gulf Cooperation Council, wants a peaceful solution to the nuclear standoff between Tehran and the West and will not allow the U.S. to use its territories for any attack on Iran.

But when asked in an interview with the daily Al-Siyassah about the consequences of an Israeli strike on Iran's nuclear reactors, analyst and former government adviser Sami al-Faraj said it would not be such a bad thing.

 

"Honestly speaking, they would be achieving something of great strategic value for the GCC by stopping Iran's tendency for hegemony over the area," he said, adding that "nipping it in the bud by Israeli hands would be less embarrassing for us than if the Americans did it."

Al-Faraj said Tehran was interfering in Iraq, Lebanon, and the Palestinian territories, and inciting strife between Sunnis and Shiites.

"The question is what would it do if it were a nuclear nation? We have to call a spade a spade and say that burying the military nuclear Iranian project is in the interest of GCC states, and other countries in the area," added al-Faraj, who heads the independent Kuwait Center for Strategy Studies.

Tehran has denied it is seeking nuclear weapons and insists its program is for peaceful purposes. Despite three sets of United Nations sanctions, it is still defying demands to suspend uranium enrichment.

GCC countries -Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Oman and Bahrain - have announced they want to use nuclear energy for civilian uses as well.

Al-Faraj told the daily the GCC offered to cooperate with Tehran on a joint nuclear fuel station, but Iran turned down the offer.

Kuwait, Bahrain and Qatar all host U.S. military facilities.

Peres: Iran is the world's greatest problem

President Shimon Peres on Sunday called Iran the world's greatest problem but said Israel would not act on its own against the Islamic nation's nuclear program.

"Iran is a danger not just for Israel but for the rest of the world, the combination of being a center of terror and developing a nuclear option is the most dangerous you can think of," he said at his official residence, a day ahead of an official visit France.

Peres said an active Iranian nuclear reactor would make the world ungovernable. But he added that the problem was not Israel's alone.

"Israel will not be forced [to act]. Israel will do whatever she should do, but Israel doesn't claim that she is the leader of the world," he said.

A Bikers Story

A Bikers Story

A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.
The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.
Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.
A reporter has seen the whole scene, and addressing the biker, says, "Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I have ever seen a man do in my whole life. ""Why, it was nothing really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger and acted as I felt was right. ""Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist, you know,and tomorrow's papers will have this on the first page. What motorcycle do you ride?"A Harley Davidson."The journalist leaves.
The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on firstpage:

BIKER GANG MEMBER ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH.

Fwd: fredagsfräckis... (Swedish Jokes)

 En jude och en norrlänning satt i bastun
då juden sa:
- Jag ser att du också gjort en omskärelse.
- Omskärelse? sa norrlänningen. I Norrland kallas det för slitage.

Lärarinnan:
- Nämn några mänsklig organ som vi har två av!
- Ögon, öron, säger barnen.
- Pitten, säger Gösta.
- Men, Gösta det har ni killar inte två av!
- Jo, min pappa har det, en liten som han pinkar med, och en stor, som
han borstar mammas tänder med.

När lille Filip en dag öppnade dörren till badrummet visade det sig att
där stod mamma och drog fram och tillbaks med pappas snopp. Filip
undrade på barns vis vad det var som föregick. Hans mor fann sig snabbt
och svarade :
- Jo du förstår pappa har blivit lite rund om magen den sista tiden så
jag släpper bara ut lite luft ur honom.
- Fadern log generat men lättad över hustruns kvicka svar.
- Det är ingen ide. sa Filip: Så fort du åkt iväg till jobbet kommer
grannkärringen och blåser upp honom igen.

Mannen till kvinnan:
- Har du tatuerat en sol på musen?
- Ja, nu har du klagat på vädret hela sommaren. Nu kan du ligga här och
lapa sol hela vintern.

Killen till tjejen i baren
- Ska du med hem och trolla?
- Trolla???
- Ja, först knullar vi som fan.. sen försvinner du.

Så var det dom två norrmännen som skulle gå på horhus.
- De bankade på dörren, bordellmamman öppnar.
- Vad vill ni?
- Vi undrar vad ni tar för vars ett nummer.
- Hur mycket pengar har ni?
- Vi har vars hundra kronor.
- Då kan ni suga av varandra.
- Det går fem minuter, sedan bankar det på dörren igen.
- Den ene norrmannen säger: Var skall vi betala?

En man tog sin hustru till en lantbruksutställning en eftermiddag.
De gick till tjurarna och tittade när en bonde kom fram till dem och sa:
- Denna tjur parade sig 50 gånger förra året.
- Ååååhhh, svarade frun och tittade menande på maken.
- Nästa tjur hade parat sig 60 gånger förra året och frun utbrast:
- Oj oj oj , det är ju 5 gånger i månaden, den skulle du lära dig av.
- Nu surade maken till ordentligt, men sa ingenting. Nästa tjur hade
parat sig 365 gånger enligt bonden, och frun blev helt stirrig och skrek:
- Aahhh, den tjuren borde du lära av ! Då sa maken, som nu var alldeles röd i plytet, till frun:
- Fråga tjuren om han måste sätta på samma KOSSA varje dag.

Du har väl läst dagens Nemi? MSN Serier

---

Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.

Modular Snake Robot!

Now this is a cool project J

 

http://youtube.com/watch?v=T62E-_pQt3c

 

TU Delft tests windmill for seawater desalination

TU Delft tests windmill for seawater desalination
29 February 2008 by M&C

Press release – A traditional windmill which drives a pump: that is the simple concept behind the combination of windmill/reverse osmosis developed by the Delft University of Technology (TU Delft) in The Netherlands. In this case, it involves a high-pressure pump which pushes water through a membrane using approximately 60 bar. This reverse osmosis membrane produces fresh water from seawater directly. The windmill is suited for use by, for instance, small villages in isolated, dry coastal areas.

The combination of windmills and desalination installations is already commercially available. These windmills produce electricity from wind power, the electricity is stored and subsequently used to drive the high-pressure pump for the reverse osmosis installation. The storage of electricity in particular is very expensive. Energy is also lost during conversion.
In the TU Delft installation, the high-pressure pump is driven directly by wind power. Water storage can be used to overcome calm periods. The storage of water is after all a great deal cheaper than that of electricity.

Robust
The chosen windmill is normally used for irrigation purposes. These windmills turn relatively slowly and are also very robust. On the basis of the windmill’s capacity at varying wind speeds, it is estimated that it will produce 5 to 10 m3 of fresh water per day: enough drinking water for a small village of 500 inhabitants. A water reservoir will have to ensure that enough water is available for a calm period lasting up to five days. Three safeguards (in the event of the installation running dry, a low number of revolutions or a high number of revolutions) are also performed mechanically so that no electricity is needed.

Prototype
The first prototype has been built and is already working at a location near the A13 motorway near Delft. This prototype is to be dismantled and transported to Curaçao the first week of March. There the concept will be tested on seawater.

More information
The research is being sponsored by Mr Grootscholten, Aqua-for-All, Hatenboer and SenterNovem. Please see www.drinkingwiththewind.nl for more information.
Bas Heijman, Drinking Water research group, faculty of Civil Engineering & Geosciences, +31 (0)15-278 4282, s.g.j.heijman@tudelft.nl
Evgenia Rabinovitch, e.n.rabinovitch@gmail.com
TU Delft Science Information Officer Roy Meijer, +31 (0)15-278 1751, r.e.t.meijer@tudelft.nl

 

He Fainted, why? :)

He Fainted, why?

A well-known cardiologist died, and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever. At that point one of the mourners burst into laughter. When confronted, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral; “I'm a gynecologist." at that point, the proctologist fainted.

 

Anyone interested in moving to New Zealand?

 

No dating, thanks, just sex

By KAREN ARNOLD - Sunday Star Times | Sunday, 02 March 2008

ON THE TOWN: Does alcohol fuel one-night stands among Kiwi women?

Dating culture is dead - instead, young New Zealand women are regularly getting drunk and cruising around in packs looking for men to have sex with.

That's one of the findings of a TVNZ Sunday investigation into the sexual behaviour of New Zealand women. The programme makers did the story after Kiwi women last year topped the Durex Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey as the world's most promiscuous.

They are reported to have an average of 20 sexual partners, double that of their Australian and British counterparts and almost three times the global average of seven.

TVNZ Sunday correspondent Janet McIntyre said there was anecdotal evidence from the five women on the show that the Durex survey findings were valid.

"There's a new kind of mating ritual sex is the point of entry into the relationship."

If the first-up sex wasn't any good women weren't prepared to waste their time progressing the relationship.

"There's no dating culture any more." In candid interviews about their sexual experiences some of the women who are all in their twenties felt empowered by having sex and wanted to celebrate and enjoy it.

McIntyre said all the women who had experienced one-night stands had been affected by alcohol, a term described by at least one expert in a report as "getting pissed and hooking up".

Men are also feeling the impact from the new sexual tactics being employed by women.

The Sunday Star-Times' Being a Bloke survey last year found that 29% of the 5000 men surveyed felt they had been pressured into having sex or had had sex unwillingly. 

 

http://www.stuff.co.nz/4422794a11.html